2017’s Worst Sexy Halloween Costumes

It’s that time of year again! When costume companies compete by scraping the bottom of the barrel to sexify literally any object/character/food they can think of, no matter how preposterous or inappropriate. Let’s see what disasters await us this year!

Blow Up Doll halloween costume
source: HalloweenCostumes.com

I wanted to start off with the worst of the bunch…and I actually had trouble choosing. So, after careful consideration, I’m going with the (sexy?) Blow-Up Doll costume. I am actually not sure if it’s supposed to be sexy or just demeaning. I mean…it’s hideous as well as pretty offensive. Of all the ridiculous costumes I’ve seen over the years doing these posts…this one truly takes the cake.

Sexy Eleven from Stranger Things costume
source: Yandy.com

This costume looks rather innocuous at first glance. But, even having never watched Stranger Things I do recognize the character Eleven. And while sexy children’s characters have been an awkwardly popular choice for costume manufacturers, this is an actual child character . Which, you know, is pretty gross.

source: Yandy.com

Sexy waitress really isn’t that weird. Sexy diner waitress isn’t odd. What struck me about this costume is that it’s actually officially licensed by Denny’s. Someone came to Denny’s with this idea and somehow, some way, it got signed off on.

source: HalloweenCostumes.com


Have you spent the last 25 years wishing you could dress up as Harry and Lloyd like the dudes? Obviously ladies couldn’t wear tacky tuxedos with top hats for Halloween, that would look silly. Luckily, some enterprising costume creators made a skirted version with tiny top hats for the gals. Much better!

source: Yandy.com

This sexy panda certainly isn’t the most absurd sexy animal costume I’ve seen (just look back at previous year’s posts) but it struck me as especially funny. Because, what’s sexier than an animal known for being absurdly lazy and continually gorging themselves on bamboo?

source: Yandy.com

Honestly, I’d have been more surprised if there wasn’t a sexy Jon Snow costume.

source: Yandy.com

This is another one that at first glance really isn’t so bad. It’s upon closer inspection that you realize that wearing a sexy outfit is pretty much the antithesis of everything Wednesday Addams stands for.

source: Yandy.com

I just don’t understand. Yoshi is not sexy. It’s Yoshi! And if you absolutely have to have a feminine version of Yoshi why not just go ahead and be the feminine version? She’s identical except for being pink and wearing a bow and so memorable I had to Google “girl Yoshi” to find out her name is Birdo.

source: Yandy.com

And finally, this…thing. I’m assuming it’s meant to be Kim Kardashian? The name of the costume is “Reality Star in the Making” and it comes with the fake belly. So like, the costume is all about the fake fetus? Why? Who knows.

Have you seen any Halloween costumes even more ridiculous than these this year?

Check out my previous year’s lists as well as a face-off between Pug and Sexy Costumes:

2016’s Worst Sexy Halloween Costumes

Who Wore It Best?

2015’s Worst Sexy Halloween Costumes

2014’s Worst Sexy Halloween Costumes

2013’s Worst Sexy Halloween Costumes